AsiaSunset
Postdoc
Posts: 4366
Reg: 11-21-04
|
12-20-14 08:44 AM - Post#178033
There is never a good time for this and perhaps this is even inappropriate on an Internet message board. I've already communicated with some of you that I know personally a few days earlier.
A week ago I lost my beloved wife in a tragic accident. She fell 10 falls to the sidewalk from a loft window in Soho in NYC. It was horrific. I have friends who'd probably feel fortunate in such circumstances, but my wife and I were deeply in love despite the fact that I could never interest her in sports. She was a lover of the arts and so much more well rounded and interesting than me
We have two beautiful children who have been with me but this is a grief that is so far beyond anything I've had to deal with in my life.
My life does go on as does my obsessional and somewhat irrational interest in Ivy League sports. This was one thing my wife never shared as my closer Internet friends know all too well.
I'm not looking for a long thread of "comforting messages". I've literally had hundreds of people parading through my house this week. While I'm struggling now to regain my balance I still find myself waking in the early hours, grabbing some coffee and sitting down at my computer. This is the first morning I've had the strength to type a message like this one.
This has been a terrible year between my daughter's beast cancer and now this. But these boards have been a part of my life and will remain so as I seek to normalize.
Again - if this seems inappropriate here - I apologize in advance. I just have spent so many hours dialoguing with so many of you anonymously on the Internet that I thought this would be helpful to me, if not to you.
I'll be back. It's been a part of my life which I'm committed to trying to put back together over time.
I'm going to post this on the Ivy football board which I've also been over involved with the past 10 years. But - I'm not alone in having these interests and I don't see them disappearing from my life. It's important for me to stay a part of this community even if it is more distant and less real than the community of my personal friends who've been at my side these past few days.
|
11Quakers
Sophomore
Posts: 123
Age: 63
Reg: 02-25-12
|
12-20-14 09:46 AM - Post#178035
In response to AsiaSunset
So sorry to hear of your tragic news.
|
weinhauers_ghost
Postdoc
Posts: 2142
Age: 64
Loc: New York City
Reg: 12-14-09
|
12-20-14 10:03 AM - Post#178036
In response to 11Quakers
Condolences to you and your family.
|
hoopla
Masters Student
Posts: 486
Age: 50
Reg: 08-28-12
|
12-20-14 10:20 AM - Post#178037
In response to weinhauers_ghost
So sorry to hear this. We all love ivy hoops and sports--a source of joy (and pain)-- but this is a reminder of what's really important. Deep condolences to you.
|
Old Bear
Postdoc
Posts: 4002
Reg: 11-23-04
|
12-20-14 10:21 AM - Post#178038
In response to weinhauers_ghost
Our thoughts are with you, you participation here has always been valued,
|
20Penn14
Senior
Posts: 364
Reg: 02-26-12
|
12-20-14 10:53 AM - Post#178040
In response to Old Bear
My deepest condolences to you and your family. We will keep you in our thoughts
|
TheLine
Professor
Posts: 5597
Age: 60
Reg: 07-07-09
|
12-20-14 11:21 AM - Post#178042
In response to 20Penn14
Condolences my friend.
Take care of what's important right now.
|
Penn7277
PhD Student
Posts: 1365
Loc: Lancaster, PA
Reg: 11-21-04
|
Some Sad News
12-20-14 12:44 PM - Post#178044
In response to TheLine
I am very sorry your loss. Take care of yourself and your family and please accept my sincerest condolences.
Edited by Penn7277 on 12-20-14 12:45 PM. Reason for edit: No reason given.
|
palestra38
Professor
Posts: 32871
Reg: 11-21-04
|
Re: Some Sad News
12-20-14 01:06 PM - Post#178046
In response to Penn7277
What a tragedy. There's little I can add other than to offer condolences (which is mighty little). I am dealing with the decline of elderly parents, but we all anticipate outliving your parents. To have your wife die and your daughter receive a cancer diagnosis in one year is truly awful. Best wishes...
|
fdiapmf
Masters Student
Posts: 590
Reg: 08-03-05
|
12-20-14 03:10 PM - Post#178049
In response to palestra38
Very sorry, I've never met you but I feel like I know you real well. Deepest condolences.
|
Tiger69
Postdoc
Posts: 2818
Reg: 11-23-04
|
12-20-14 05:14 PM - Post#178051
In response to fdiapmf
Although we have never met, I feel a community with most on this board. I am very sorry for your loss. I hope that you have close friends nearby. Best wishes to you as you face the next few months.
|
Cvonvorys
Postdoc
Posts: 4508
Loc: Princeton, New Jersey
Reg: 10-11-06
|
12-20-14 05:37 PM - Post#178057
In response to Tiger69
P38 is right... There is so little we can offer in terms of comfort. I hope that knowing that there are so many people on these boards (people that have never met you, yet still feel like they know you through your posts) who were deeply saddened to hear about your loss and are sincerely sorry for your loss... I hope this provides some comfort...
|
pennsive
Junior
Posts: 200
Reg: 11-21-04
|
Re: Some Sad News
12-20-14 05:53 PM - Post#178058
In response to AsiaSunset
Very sorry to hear this, Asia. We have a mutual long-time friend from your hometown who went to Rutgers. He'll want to share his sincere condolences. May your memories, and your children's memories, of her always be a blessing and a comfort to you.
|
UPIA1968
PhD Student
Posts: 1122
Loc: Cornwall, PA
Reg: 11-20-06
|
Re: Some Sad News
12-20-14 09:06 PM - Post#178065
In response to AsiaSunset
I will keep you and your family in my prayers. I am glad you had the courage to write of your loss.
Sincerely
Noël Perry
|
SteveChop
PhD Student
Posts: 1156
Reg: 07-28-07
|
Re: Some Sad News
12-20-14 10:01 PM - Post#178068
In response to AsiaSunset
Like the other people who have left messages on his board, I also offer my sincerest condolences on your tragic loss. Having read your posts for years, I feel that I know you too. While we all know that the giant hole in your heart will never heal completely, I trust and pray that you have MANY fond and loving memories of your wife - your courtship, your marriage and your life together. And while you have endured a different type of pain this year for your daughter, hopefully she is on the road to recovery and, more importantly, she will always be an embodiment of the love and relationship that you and your late wife produced. I view all of us on this board as a community and we'll be here for you. May your wife rest in peace and hope that you are comforted by your family and friends.
|
SRP
Postdoc
Posts: 4919
Reg: 02-04-06
|
12-21-14 05:55 AM - Post#178080
In response to SteveChop
Not much to add to what others have said, but I look forward to reading your posts in the future. I am very sorry for your loss.
|
1LotteryPick1969
Postdoc
Posts: 2277
Age: 73
Loc: Sandy, Utah
Reg: 11-21-04
|
12-21-14 09:50 AM - Post#178086
In response to SRP
My condolences for your loss.
Thank you for your post. It is a vivid reminder to all of us of the fragility of human life. Everything we treasure can be gone in an instant.
Each of us should take a moment to tell a spouse we love her/him, hug the children and grandchildren, and tell them we love them as well.
Again, my condolences.
|
Ernie Nounou
Freshman
Posts: 12
Reg: 12-21-14
|
12-21-14 05:48 PM - Post#178110
In response to 1LotteryPick1969
Asia -
Decency and humanity concerns for your tragedy to be sure; but what is it that draws me to register for this forum and 1st-time post to an anonymous poster, with whom I've been on opposite side of multiple Penn sports exchanges (often contentious) on the DP? For me it is also a recognition of a fellow traveler in the college sports world, and the power of sports to build community - a quality too often lost by those who should know better.
From your fellow sports traveler and NYC neighbor, my most sincere wish for strength, comfort, and solace.
|
Ted
Junior
Posts: 222
Reg: 12-23-12
|
Re: Some Sad News
12-21-14 11:49 PM - Post#178128
In response to AsiaSunset
Like others on this board have said, I feel like I know you, from reading your always heartfelt and insightful posts to both this forum and the DP, over the years. I think that in a way, we are all a form of kindred spirits, brought together by Penn/Ivy sports. My sincerest condolences to you and your family.
|
Quakers03
Professor
Posts: 12533
Reg: 12-07-04
|
12-22-14 02:15 PM - Post#178157
In response to Ted
I am so sorry Asia. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. I think it's safe to say that your story has hit each one of us in a different way and I only hope that you and your family will forever cherish the wonderful memories that you've accumulated. I hate to say it but a love like yours is becoming more and more rare and while no one should ever have it cut short, at least you experienced that wonderfulness. Hopefully time helps to heal...
|
